Nano 2017 Lego Thing Part Twenty Six
Dugan turned to Franklin Honey after the repairs to the ship were complete. “So Mr. Honey, what plans await you in the future days of your life?”
“I want to own an Inn in the city,” said Franklin, smiling. “And please, call me Franklin!”
“Ah Franklin, a businessman! You know,” said Count Dugan. “Lord Grimlow often invests in businesses. Please write to us when your Inn opens and perhaps we could work out a deal.”
“That’s wonderful!,” said Franklin. “And after that I’d like to build a machine that brings plastic toys to life.”
Alex took a sip of his mocha. “I should never have started writing headphone reviews,” he typed into his chat program.
“Hahaha, you think so?,” typed his friend.
“Yeah. I spend a good chunk of my writing time now just trying to tell people which headphone is ‘better.’ There is some weird satisfaction in answering questions about stuff when I might know the answer, but other times I’m just awash in a soup of subjective opinions.”
Selena had finally managed to find a few other solid baristas to work in the Beanland, and business continued to boom. With the uptick in customers, she was able to lure a few folks away from one of the chains with higher salaries. On her way to her lunch break, she stopped by Alex’s table. “Hey, did you see this morning’s paper?”
Alex looked up. “Does everyone in this town read the newspaper except for me?”
“They wrote about me again. Mentioned your blog. Linked to it.”
“Hah!,” said Alex. “Those jokers! They fell right into the trap. Good.”
“I bet they’re going to try and run you out of town.”
Alex shrugged. “They’d have to come in here first and they already hate you. If I see anyone, I’ll just direct them to the closest that everyone thinks is the bathroom.”
“Wait, what?,” asked Selena.
“Oh yeah,” said Alex. “This closet right here next to me that’s not the bathrooms that are behind me! Every day, I see at least three people try to enter it as if it were the bathroom.”
Selena smirked. “I had no idea. That’s hilarious.”
Galadriel, Catwoman, and the party of Vikings landed on a wooden floor next to a whirring contraption full of wheels, gears, and old rubber belts. A strange-looking human man started dancing around next to it.
“It works it works it works!,” he shouted.
Galadriel ran over to the man and promptly kicked him in the foot. This startled the man. “Be silent giant human, and tell us where we are!”
Franklin Honey carefully got down on the ground, He held out his hand to shake Galadriel’s claw…but she refused it. “I…I am Franklin Honey, miss. I built this machine to bring toys like you to life!”
“That’s…that’s very odd,” said Galadriel. “How do we get out of here? We are on an important mission and I don’t have time to discuss metaphysics.”
“I suppose…I suppose through the door?” said Franklin, sheepishly. “It’s weird, because you all look nothing like the solitary wooden figure I put into the machine. Strange right? I made the toy myself. I didn’t want to risk testing the machine on anyone else’s toys. Seemed wrong.”
A scratching noise came from the bowels of the machine and a small door popped open. Out climbed wooden Sauron.
“Hahaha!,” yelled wooden Sauron. “I’m back! And here you thought that the ending of this story would just be a meandering ramble without an antagonist. But no. I’m back. And made of wood!”
“I can see all of this,” said Galadriel. “You are an unimpressive buffoon.”
Catwoman pulled forth the Space Laser Gun and shot Wooden Sauron in the face. It set him lightly ablaze. He began to run all over the room.
“Wow!,” shouted Franklin, “this is so cool! My toys are fighting!”
Wooden Sauron tipped over and burned into a small pile of ashes.
Galadriel turned to Catwoman. “Do you need a job, or anything? You are a skilled vanquisher of evil.”
Catwoman raised an eyebrow. “Sure. How much does it pay?”
“I never considered what I would do with the toys once I brought them to life,” said Franklin Honey. “Maybe I should make a toy out of myself!”
Catwoman laughed. “I’ve already met him. Trust me honey, you shouldn’t.”
Frank Honey and Robin finished their donuts, and hit the streets looking for the evil library criminal. Chase McCain walked by on the street, did a double take, and ran over to them.
“Whoa hey guys!,” said Chase. “I never thought I’d see you again after Frank ripped all those pages out of the book! It was so weird! I went like flying into a weird chasm, and then I landed back inside the police station, and I’ve been wandering around for days since then looking for someone so we could go find that guy or get the orbs or whatever.”
Robin and Frank both turned to each other and blinked. Frank looked Chase up and down. “I’m sorry fella, do I know you? You seem like a swell guy! And I used to be a police officer, so maybe I saw you when I was in the office before I was fired?”
Chase’s face turned to a look of horror. “Say it ain’t so, Frank! It’s me! Your buddy Chase! We were partners…sort of. When you were a cop. We were never really partners but you used to always pretend that we were partners and it was sort of sweet. Sometimes we would even go on missions together. Once you rode a horse backwards and went to the wrong place, and then went sunbathing with the horse at your parents’ hotel.”
Frank’s face turned to one of surprise. “My parents own a hotel! That’s so cool! I wonder if that has anything to do with my grandfather’s dream of owning his own inn.”
Chase’s face turned to one of concern. “Okay phew, it’s not me. You’ve lost your memory. You don’t know what your parents do. That’s good! It means I’m not going crazy!”
Robin lifted his hands into the air. “I don’t remember anything that happened before two days ago, when I popped out of a drawer in a detective agency!”
Chase raised one of his claw hands to his head. “Oh no, you’ve both lost your memories. This is worse than I thought. Okay, think, who can I take you guys to?
“So what’s the deal with your whole finger snapping thing, Lady Galadriel?,” asked Catwoman. “Like, were you born with that? How do you even manage to do it since we don’t have fingers?”
“Those are all very prescient questions,” said Lego Galadriel. “I already feel vindicated in hiring you as my second in command.”
Franklin Honey was running around trying not to step on the little Lego Adventurers, still very excited that his machine worked.
“I will explain it all to you in time, but first I think we ought to try and get out of here,” said Galadriel.
The hatch on the side of the machine started to rumble and pop. It blasted open again and EVIL GALADRIEL flew out. “Not so fast, my errant sister!,” she yelled in a scratchy voice. “It is I, back from the dead and the depths of time and space! I’ve come to stop you!”
Franklin Honey grabbed Evil Lego Galadriel and immediately popped her tiny plastic head off and threw it across the room. A grand cheer rose up from the Vikings and their leaders.
“I owe you an apology, Master Honey,” said Lego Galadriel. “Here I thought you were an idiot, but it seems you are merely a doofus.”
“Just trying to help. I know evil when I see it!,” said Franklin Honey.
Lady Galadriel gave a small bow. “If you would please direct us outside, I would appreciate it. It seems my power won’t work in this small wooden box you call a home.”
Franklin Honey walked over and opened the door. “It is this way, my lady!”
“That’s so far away!,” yelled the Viking Chieftain. “It would take us over a day’s travel to walk that far, my lady!”
“Our Viking friend is right, Franklin. Would you do us the honor of…carrying us?”
Chase took Robin and Frank to the library, hoping that he could find the mysterious book again that Frank was carrying around before and jog their memory. Upon entering, the lady behind the counter screamed.
“That’s the man that ruined the library! D…detective? Wow I didn’t think you’d find him so fast! Arrest him!”
Chase McCain was very confused.
Frank Honey smiled. “It didn’t take any work at all, really! I just ran into him on the street.”
“I don’t like it when I’m the only person in the coffee shop, and then people sit down right next to me,” typed Alex in his chat program.
“Is that happening right now?,” asked his friend.
“Yes. Yes it is. And I don’t know what to do about it. So I’m passive aggressively typing to you about it.”
“I’m surprised you’re the only one in there, isn’t it usually really busy?”
Alex shook his head even though his friend couldn’t see him. “Not on Sunday nights. I think everyone is either at home waiting to refresh their computers for Cyber Monday, or over at the weird ice skating rink, or whatever. I don’t know. It’s kind of nice though…at least when there’s not a huge loud group sitting next to you.”
“I guess you could move.”
“And give up my favorite table? I’m not THAT crazy! Anyway, thank you for participating in this scene, I ran out of ideas for today’s Nanowrimo story chapter thing whatever and I needed some filler to get my word count up. This is one of the many reasons why this exercise is stupid, but I have to keep typing and filling up the bars. I should probably make a cliffhanger now so that the story ends on some excitement for today, and not just on me whining about things.”
Frank Honey was 8 years old. His bedroom was full of drawings of all sorts of things he liked, and toys piled around in various scenes of battle or adventure. He was just putting the finishing touches on an action scene that took place in a laboratory run by a scientist who could bring toys to life and—
“Frank! It’s time to come down for dinner!”